By Chevonne Harris–
Sex is an interesting thing. For every action there is a reaction and for every position there are a plethora of outcomes. While generally swell in the moment, (for most of us that is), not all romps around the rosie are right for you. Here are our recommendations of the top five steamy situations to avoid:
There are certain times in life when we must be fully present. Sex is one of them. Doing the deed is awkward enough, so why complicate matters with tainted breath, slurred words, fumbled touches and a less than stellar performance. There’s also the dreaded next day to deal with. That moment after you’ve collected your under garments and are starring yourself down in bathroom mirror coming to terms with the fact that you’ve just engaged in an activity you otherwise would have avoided in a sober state. Getting it on under the influence of anything is never a good idea.
He cheated and instead of kicking your philandering partner to the left, you decide to seek the ultimate revenge by having a one-time romp with his best friend. Seldom does payback sex end well. By doing equal or bigger dirt than your beau you now run the risk of looking like an even bigger jerk. There’s also that pesky social stigma that brands you with the Scarlett Letter for supposedly stepping out on your man. There’s plenty of other ways to hurt someone than by jumping into the sack with another person. Besides, when you’ve resorted to having sex with someone all in the hopes of getting your beau riled up, nine times out of 10, you’ve lost the battle.
Doubt means don’t. Whether it’s a boyfriend, husband, man of the hour, never should ever lay down with someone who insists on putting their needs before yours. The problem with pressured sex is that it can easily lead to difficult to manage expectations. What seems like a one-time, get him off your back thing in your mind quickly translates to, “I can have it whenever I want it” in his mind.
Did I or didn’t I? You never want to end sex with the lingering question of whether or not you contracted an STD, or are now carrying the baby of the guy from the bar or the boyfriend with the questionable family genes. Talk about a mood killer. Do yourselves a favor and wrap it up folks.
Don’t let the sob stories fool you. A good friend once confessed to sleeping with a guy she had no intention of pursuing a relationship with because she felt sorry for him after the recent passing of his father. In the midst of being a crying shoulder, she somehow ended the night on her back. Yes your body is a wonderland, but when and where we can, try not to offer it up as a consolation prize.
He’s here, you’re there and you guys kind of like each other so why not. Well there are plenty of reasons. For starters, consider the after effects. Is this a one-time thing, or a friends with benefits set-up? Are you both emotionally detached from the situation? At some point would you like to meet his mother? Trust me, this is a road you need not travel down; there’s just too many unexpected twists and turns. I hate to get deep on you, but sex should be more than a good time with a guy you’re so-so about. At it’s best, it’s a physical, mental and spiritual connection that is an outwardly expression of the love (or strong like) you feel for someone. At it’s worst, it’s well, a good time with a guy you’re so-so about. Treat yourself to something better and leave the guys with no strings alone.