By Chevonne Harris–
So February 14 is coming and once again us single girls are finding ourselves inundated with advice from “experts” telling us how to compensate the touch of a man with wine, chocolate binges, yoga classes and “Love Jones” marathons for roughly 17 hours. All are fine and dandy if your life is a Julia Roberts movie (though I doubt Vivian Ward ever watched a Larenz Tate movie), but not always the best means to a delightful evening for some of us. So before you purchase your Valentine’s Day survival kit, heed these warnings of what not to do.
Don’t Dread It.
It’s one day a year. Nobody died (hopefully) and come February 15, V-Day will be but a mere wilted and stale fruit memory for most of the world. Don’t get your feelings in knot because you’re flying solo. Instead thank your lucky stars you get to pocket a few dollars instead of splurging on Kenneth Cole cologne, Heat tickets and Express sweaters.
Don’t Reminiscence On The One That Got Away
It’s natural for your mind to drift on what could have been, but let the past be the past. Nothing is worse than an emotional hangover so spare yourself the heartache and potential embarrassment. Remember, he got away for a reason.
Don’t Binge On…Well Anything
If you’re feeling some type of way about Valentine’s Day then it’s probably not the best night drown your sorrows in chick flicks and Cookies and Cream ice cream. It’s fun the moment but you’re thighs will regret it. Also beware of the next tip…
Don’t Turn to the Bottle
Ok, let me rephrase. A little drunkenness is acceptable, but when tipsy transitions into ratchetness we have a problem. I said it before and I’ll say it again. It’s a day; not a tailgate party. Take a shot, make it a movie night, hang with your girls and keep it moving.
Don’t Have Random Sex.
Whether it’s an ex, guy across the bar, co-worker or friend, it never ends well. Ever.
Don’t Go Out Of Your Way to Prove to the World You’re Single and Happy.
Before you post that bouquet of flowers you pre-ordered in August or Google self-love affirmation memes — don’t. Like the old folks always say, if you have to say it… You’re human and it’s okay to have a moment. Personally I prefer we all give a big *Kanye shrug* to love’s holiday but if that’s not your style, it’s perfectly fine. Do you boo but be real about it. Better yet stay off social media and keep your feelings between you, your journal and a girlfriend, not your social network. Yes treating yourself to a spa day and masking your self-pity with witty tweets and hashtags of you getting a mud rub is cool and all, but desperate attempts at diverting attention from the truth is not. [Your name here]; party of one? Yay you.
Don’t Guilt Yourself If You Need To Take A Moment.
Everybody wants somebody and that’s nothing to be ashamed of. Your feelings are your feelings and we’d all be lying to ourselves if we said we didn’t want a Will to our Jada (minus the alleged open marriage thing). The trick is not marinating in your feelings for an entire day, week and so on.
Don’t Let One Day Overshadow All the Good In Your Life
This is a big one. With the exception of a life partner, you have plenty to be thankful for. Being single is not the end of the world. If you must spend time reflecting on Cupid’s day, reflect on the many blessings you have, not what your life is supposedly lacking. Make a list of all your blessing and thank God for however many bullets you end up with. Nine times out of ten when you do this, not having an Edible Arrangement delivered to your office seems a minute. Challenge yourself to count your blessings and not your candy hearts.