I admit it; I’m not social media sexy. Not to downplay my real life appearance (which is pretty decent), but for some reason, translating my normal, unfiltered look to the social community has always been a struggle. I’ve never been the most photogenic person and ever sense the explosion of Facebook during my college days, my aversion to digital and cell phone cameras has only magnified. Daily I scroll through my various social media sites wondering how these girls, and some guys (you know the ones, the eclectic, skinny jean, non-prescription black-rimmed glasses, checkered suit, bow tie, lives in Missouri but thinks he’s in LA, kind of guy) do it.
Whether it’s a close-up, party pic, outfit showcase, or the classic, #JustChillin, #JustBored, but still managed to have my hair and makeup in-tact, comfy-cute pic; for some reason, finding the perfect camera angle and ambient lighting, all in the confines of the bathroom mirror, while managing to not snap my toilet and overflowing bin of hair products, has always eclipsed me.
But alas, the days of posting news updates, scenery shots and Google’d self-affirmations are over. After taking some time to troll the newsfeeds, I’ve finally unlocked the key to fail-proof, guaranteed social media sexy photos. It’s important to note that if done correctly, these this will also prevent you from becoming victim to the recent selfie backlash. So read up ladies and get ready to get your Annie Leibovitz on, cell phone style, because these tips will ensure you’re next Facebook photo session is a hit.
Marilyn Monroe was truly a lady ahead of her time. Who knew the sour-patch, duck face would be such a hit. Perks of this pose? It’s a surefire way to hide the double chin, gives hint to a seemingly strong jaw line, and says, “I’m trying to convey that I’m innocent, fun and flirty, but may sleep with you if given the proper amount of alcohol kind of girl.” Coupled with a bug eye, raised brow, and glossed lip, this go-to is sure to get the thumbs up.
Mirror poses are always tricky, but when done properly definitely make you look more attractive while giving your followers insight into your fast-paced life during the moments your real friends aren’t around to take your photo. When it comes to the mirror pic, angles are everything. Always strive for the aerial view, as it makes the lower half of your body appear much smaller and enlarges your cleavage. When possible, try not to have your phone in the actual shot. We all know it’s a mirror photo but a visible phone (particularly if it’s not an iPhone) exudes a lack of effort and class. And make sure to do artistic poses like the head tilt, post lip-lick, hand on the hip or duck face, as these have proven to illicit positive responses.
Boobies Are a Must
It goes without saying that the more cleavage the better. Tank tops, camis, V-necks and pre- or post- workout sports bras are always a must. Again, your camera angle is key here. Always strive for the top-down approach to maximize the amount of boobage in the shot. Not too blessed in the décolletage department? Try leaning forward, gently pushing the girls together while serving your best duck face.
Another strong pose is the on-the-back. While lying in bed, hold the camera at arms length above your head with your hair strategically strewn about on your best toss pillow (C-cups and beyond beware, when held too long, this position has been known to cause strained breathing).
Get Close (Like Really Close)
Not only is a close-up a great way to show the world how awesome you think your face is, it’s also the photo of choice for anyone who may not be ready to reveal the lower half of their physique to the world (Catfish anyone?). Also try this pose with sunglasses or behind the wheel to gain instant swag points. Don’t worry about people thinking you’re a reckless driver, your seatbelt will be visible so no worries there.
#PicStitch is Your Friend
Photo collages are ideal for those of us eager to showcase our hipster-chic style but for the most part prefer to stay out of the lens. To achieve this look grab your favorite handbag, stilettos (Red Bottoms preferably), a fedora, sunglasses, suspenders, or whatever else cool people wear, slap it under a sierra overlay and post away.
When In Doubt, Make A Funny Face
Tried all of the above and still not happy with the end result? Well flash a thumbs up, scrunch your nose, curl your lip and call it a day. Funny faces are a great way to distract attention from the real features of your face. They also say to the world you don’t take yourself too seriously but still find the time to strategically capture yourself making absurd facial expressions.
Well Coloureds there you have it. Charge your phone, grab a mirror and get to snapping!